Summary

Nick Gray provides practical tips to throw the perfect 2-hour cocktail party. Host a 15-person event at home on a Monday-Wednesday from 7pm-9pm. Have your core group RSVP before reaching out to great guests. Send reminders one week out, three days out, and the morning of. Structure your party around 2-3 icebreakers to encourage more interaction. Give a 10-minute warning and end the party quickly and confidently with a group photo. After, take a moment to reflect and send out thank you notes.

Key Takeaways

• Mon-Wed, 7-9pm, at home, 15 people
• Core group vs great guests
• Ask if you can give more info (RSVP page)
• One week out, three days out, morning of
• Delegate roles to encourage involvement
• Party harmonica to grab attention
• Icebreakers: short survey of the room
  • With 5 people after 20-30 mins, go first
  • With 40 mins left, give 5 mins to prepare
• 10-minute warning (end quickly and confidently)
• Reflect, say thank you + group photo

Notes

1: Why host a party

• Meet new people, boost your reputation, strengthen relationships
• Strength of weak ties

2: When to host your party

• Mon-Wed: not heavyweight days
• 7-9pm

3: Where to host your party

• Host at home
• Small places feel intimate and special
• Other options: park, library, office, etc.
• Not bar or restaurant

4: Who to invite

• Have a core group
• 15 total is optimal amount

5: Name tags

• Boost confidence, reduce social anxiety
• Safe opportunity to approach strangers
• Puts everyone on equal footing
• “Can I confess something? I forgot your name but I remember you from…”
• Host Rights name tags, not guests
• Kindly enforce name tag use
• Names are sacred (Dale Carnegie)

6: Sending out first invitations

• Core group first, then other invites
• Core group: personalized, short, tentative
• “May I send you more info?”
• “Great, I’ll make an RSVP page and send more info soon!”

7: Setting up the event page

• Social contract, social proof
• “Cocktails and icebreakers”
• Emphasize drinks and meeting people
• Partiful, Mixily
• Confirm interested + available before sending the link to avoid too many maybes

8: Inviting your great guests

• Invite with more info than core group
• Ask if you can give more info (like core)
• If no, ask to invite to next party

9: Sending out reminders

• One week out: with a picture
  • Excited, looking forward to seeing
• Three days out: with some guest bios
  • Brief, light bios, “ask them about”
• Morning of: logistics, address
• Don’t be afraid to hype up party

10: Pre-party preparations

• Drinks, chips + dip, nuts, grapes, cheese
• Clear plastic cups
• Declutter room, empty trash
• Prep bathroom, remove big towels
• Clean fridge
• Test music, upbeat energetic
• Perform a final walkthrough as guest would

11: First 20 minutes

• Give first arrivals a special welcome, exciting night ahead
• Delegate roles to encourage involvement
• Roles: connector (talk with everyone), greeter, bartender, name writer, high five-r
• Party harmonica to grab attention

12: Beginner icebreakers

• Icebreakers: short survey of the room
• First one with 4-5 people
• “What do you like to eat for breakfast?”
• Start first and invite vivid and detailed descriptions of work and icebreaker
• “Go grab a drink, meet someone new, and we’ll do another icebreaker in 20 mins”
• Repeat same icebreaker with more people
• Natural way to break up stale convos

13: Advanced icebreakers

• Favorite vice
• A book you’ve read recently
• A piece of media you’ve consumed recently
• Favorite purchase this past year
• Secret spots or life hacks for this city
• If you did a city-wide poll, what about?
• If you could teach a class, what about?
• With 40 mins left, give 5 mins to prepare
• Group photo! (selfie)

14: End on a high note

• End quickly and confidently
• Give a 10-minute warning

15: Day after

• Reflect
• Say thank you + group photo
• Ask to invite to next party