Summary

Fisher’s classic introduces principled negotiation: a method that avoids positional bargaining by focusing on four key elements: separating people from the problem, focusing on interests rather than positions, inventing options for mutual gain, and insisting on objective criteria. The method produces wise agreements efficiently while maintaining relationships. The book also addresses power imbalances, reluctant negotiators, and dirty tricks – making it the definitive guide to getting what you want without making enemies.

"The difference in belief provides a basis for a deal."

"I want a high price, you want a low price. What's a fair price?"

"I think you're great. My concern is fairness."

"Is it in our mutual interest to have both of us use this tactic?"

Key Takeaways

Notes

1: Problem: don't bargain over positions

• Negotiation: discussion designed to reach an agreement when some interests are shared and others are opposed
• Hard vs soft vs principled negotiation
• 3 criteria:
  • Produce a wise agreement
  • Efficient
  • Not damage relationship b/w parties
• Wise agreement:
  • Meets the legitimate interest of each party if possible
  • Resolves conflicting interests fairly
  • Durable
  • Takes community interests into account
• Meta-positioning: how decision will be reached
• Principled negotiation: 4 points:
  • People, interests, options, criteria

2: Method: separate the people from the problem

• Humans have emotions, deeply held values, different backgrounds and viewpoints, and they are unpredictable
• ↑ cognitive biases, partisan perceptions, blind spots, and leaps of illogic
• Substance + relationship
• Extreme position → do not value 1) our relationship or 2) me very highly
• 3 categories of people problems:
  • Perception
  • Emotion
  • Communication
• Must be able to understand, empathize with their point of view
• Never blame
• Feeling of participating in the process
• Let them save face: not a loss, but based on principles
• Emotions driven by 5 core interests:
  • Autonomy: control own fate
  • Appreciation: recognized + valued
  • Affiliation:
  • Role: meaningful purpose
  • Status: fairly seen, acknowledged
• ↑ perceived threat to identity
• Make feelings / emotions an explicit focus of discussion → proactive vs reactive
• Allow airing of grievances: "continue…"
• Apologize without accepting responsibility
• 3 problems of communication:
  • Closed to changing mind: no longer talking to each other, but to impress
  • Not really listening
  • Misinterpreting
• Listen actively, acknowledge, relay what they say
• People with a joint problem
• State how you feel (can't disagree)
• Turn a stranger into a friend
• Ask for a favor
  • Eg. Ben Franklin asking to borrow book
• Establish a basis for mutual trust

3: Method: focus on interests, not positions

• Many more interests are shared than opposed
• Put yourself in their shoes and ask "why?"
• Think about other stakeholder's interests
• Consider explaining your interests
• Interest, reasoning → position, rec.
• Focus on the future, not the past
• Leverage cognitive dissonance: attack the problem, support the other person

4: Method: invent options for mutual gain

• 4 obstacles to more options:
  • Premature judgement
  • Searching for the one answer
  • Assumption of a fixed pie
  • Thinking that solving their problem is their problem
• Invent creative options:
  • Separate inventing vs judging options
  • Broaden options on the table
  • Search for mutual gains
  • Invent ways of making their decision easy
• Second-order agreement: agree on where you disagree
• "The difference in belief provides a basis for a deal" (eg. buying stock)
• Fair, legal, honorable
• Search for precedent

5: Method: insist on using objective criteria

• Find independent standards
• Fair procedure
  • Eg. one cuts the other chooses
• Arbitrator
• "I want a high price, you want a low price. What's a fair price?" →
• Why? What's your theory? / standard?
• How'd you arrive at that conclusion?
• Agree on principles

6: What if they are more powerful?

• Avoid a bottom line: never a single variable
• BATNA: best alternative to a negotiated agreement
• Only disclose BATNA if better than they probably think
• Developing BATNA is the best thing you can do against a more powerful party

7: What if they won't play?

• Stick to merits > positions
• Negotiation Jiu Jutsu: ↓
• Break the cycle of counterattacking
• Channel into exploring interests, inventing options, searching for independent standards
• Walk through the hypothetical to expose blind spots
• Invite: ask what's wrong with proposal? What's not taken into account?
• Questions > statements
• One-text procedure: mediator keeps re-drafting agreement until all parties agree
• "I think you're great. My concern is fairness"
• "It's not a question of trust"

8: What if they use dirty tricks?

• Tricky bargaining tactics
• ↑ basically one-sided negotiation of procedure
• ↑ counter with principled negotiation of the negotiation process
• Key theme: reciprocity
• Start by calling it out
• "Is it in our mutual interest to have both of us use this tactic?"
• Make sure you're talking to the decision maker
• "I only negotiate on the merits. My reputation is built on not responding to threats"
• Don't be a victim